scrimpton

a modern sport, consisting of two or more people jumping meaninglessly and throwing themselves around on an air bed/mattress. this is perhaps better played in an enclosed area such as a tent, to prevent the compet-tors from falling or tumbling off the bouncy mattress.

legend has it, that scrimpton was originally created, when two teenage boys were having a fight in a tent. when one boy fell onto the air-filled mattress, he allegedly had an epiphany. he thought, “why do we insist on fighting each other, when we could put our differences aside and have a tremendous time jumping and falling onto this surprisingly hilarious airbed?”. he aired this realisation to his friend, who instantly agreed and they proceeded to tell a few immediate friends of their discovery. since this day, scrimpton has never looked back, and has now become a worldwide phenomenon.
“hey brian, you fancy a quick round of scrimpton?”

-“no thanks horace mate, it’s a bit too rough for me”
“oh come on brian! don’t be a peekacheese! it’s really fun, everybody loves a bit of scrimpton.”
-“fine horace, you win. scrimpton it is.”