shuttle drop
an action used primarily on pizza shuttle’s pizzas. known for their excessive amounts of grease, these pizzas require very specific handling. in addition to the necessity of eating them only within an hour of the purchase, one can preform the ‘shuttle drop’. essentially, after purchasing said pizza, one leaves it in the box, flips it over, and drops the pizza on the floor. the pizza is then picked up, and the inside of the box is examined. the grease that was once on the pizza has now been soaked up by the cardboard. the pizza is now ready for consumption.
person one: “oh goodie….pizza shuttle pizza!”
person two: “quick….let us eat it before it becomes a slab of concrete saturated by grease!”
person one: “nonsense…quick! preform the shuttle drop and all will be well!”
person two: “don’t be silly!” -eats pizza- “oh no…i can feel my arteries clogging!” -dies”
person three: “holy wow! what happened to him?!”
person one: “he neglected the shuttle drop.”
person three: “then he deserved to die.”
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