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giving a rim job on an airplane.
“hey patrick, how did your flight go?”
“it was great! joined the mile high club, and gave john a skyrim.”
a highly effective form of birth control made public on nov. 11, 2011. despite its recent release, it is believed to be incredibly effective for periods lasting a week to 2 months once administered. pharmaceutical company bethesda is currently working on supplements to accompany this drug but no release dates have been set yet.

as it is still a new product its long-term effects have yet to be determined, though it is believed to not be as potent as wow or other substances within the mmo cl-ss of drugs.

the fda warns that this is a schedule ii drug, indicating a very high chance of addiction if not carefully monitored and regulated. symptoms of overdose and addiction include loss of appet-te, insomnia, sudden weight gain or loss, dimensia, a constant desire for more dragon souls, and the singing of harry partridge’s -ssociated songs.
billy and cathy haven’t had s-x since skyrim came out because one of them is playing it at any given moment.
skyrim (n)

the fifth game in the elder scrolls series, and arguably the best game in the history of mankind. by purchasing this game, you have sold your soul to bethesda softworks–which is a pretty even trade-off, actually. once you start this game—ssuming your computer/xbox 360/ps3 doesn’t burst into flames of righteous fury due to it’s lack of uberness– you will not be seeing the sun for a while.

side effects include: weight loss, paleness of skin, weight gain, reluctance to leave your chair, death, peeing in a bottle, ordering pizza every night because you can’t stop playing long enough to make some food, loss of the ability to distinguish between fantasy and reality. loss of girlfriend.
guy: i hear the end of the world will be in 2012.
me: at least i get a year to play skyrim.
guy: it’s also supposed to end on october 21st.
me: then i’ll die playing skyrim.

i used to have a girlfriend. then i found out skyrim was coming out.
the 5th chapter of the elder scrolls series, release date of 11.11.11. all other developers should just take a break for 2011 because everyone will be too busy saving money and nerdgasming to worry about any other game.

i have seen the gates of 2011, beyond which no waking eye may see… behold, in november, a goty sweeps the land…
dood 1: watches skyrim trailer

dood 1: omfgicantbelieveitsfinallyhereljdinysrvdl
a m-ssive -rg-sm that is 300 hours long but takes many years to come
guy: hey i heard skyrim was coming out
guy2: aaaaaaaaaah! -c-m shots everywhere-
my deliverence from my social life.
-buys skyrim-
-deletes facebook, destroys phone, burns picture of friends and girlfriend, orders 500 pizzas ans 500 gallons of c-ke, locks door, and puts rifle in reaching distance-
-turns on xbox 360-

booooooooooooooooooooooom!
a brilliant rpg that consumes your whole life and makes everything else in the world meaningless.
skyrim>all
like popular mmorpg games, it has the ability to make one play for countless hours on end. it is known to contain 300 hours of gameplay if you play once and do everything there is to do. however, many create multiple characters of different races, resulting in months and years of ceaseless playing.

many consider skyrim as a drug, as it is addicting, can ruin your life, and it has various amounts of side affects. side affects include: memory loss, weight loss/gain, worsened eyesight, headache, wet and smelly pants, loss of family, loss of intimate relationships, loss of life, loss of s-x etc.

skyrim, although a m-ssive and possibly the best game of the decade, is still argued to be worse than morrowind. morrowind fans are constantly raging on skyrim fans, claiming morrowind is far more superior. however, the game skyrim not only includes the landm-ss of skyrim, but also cyrodil and morrowind, and possibly other places in tamriel. thus, if a dlc or mod comes out that makes use of these unused landm-sses, oblivion and morrowind fans may migrate to this new elder scrolls installment.

on the first day of release, game retailers were open at midnight just to sell this new game. around 3.5 million copies were sold on the release date. over 230,000 people were playing skyrim on steam on it’s day of release, topping call of duty: modern warfare 3.
before skyrim
morrowind fans rage at oblivion fans
couples have s-x on a normal routine
the grades of students are at their average level

after skyrim
morrowind fans rage at both skyrim and oblivion fans, and the occasional oblivion fan claims that oblivion is superior
a large portion of couples cease to exist, and the amount of people having s-x was dramatically plunged
students have started failing school

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