slap up

the act of striking one’s flaccid p-n-s against their own lower abdomen, in order to create a resonating ‘clonking’ sound.

it is absolutely essential that the p-n-s is flaccid. the softer the p-n-s, the louder and deeper the ‘clonk’.

having lots of excess foreskin can also have an advantage as it adds a ‘whipping’ noise to the ‘clonk’.

if the tip of the flaccid p-n-s can reach the naval, then it creates a beautiful, deep ‘bonk’ sound.
once the slap up has been fully mastered, the ‘clonk’, ‘whip’ and ‘bonk’ sounds can all be heard with one well timed crack of the p-n-s.
some slap up’s can be heard for miles around, and is said to be part of a mating call used by people in certain parts of the world.
once again it is essential that the p-n-s is flaccid. striking a hard p-n-s against the lower abdomen can cause the p-n-s blood vessels to burst, bruising, internal bleeding, and even death.
pete: ‘hey dave, can you hear that resonating clonking sound coming from over there?’
dave: ‘yeah i think its someone having a slap up.’
pete: ‘what makes you think that?’
dave: ‘i can smell it.’
to give, to share something with someone.
slap me up with some of that dirty burger, you monkey. (whilst at mcdonalds.)