starfish baby


when a parent of a child (usually aged 2 months-2 yrs. old), straps their kid onto the front of them with one of those “baby carriers”, resulting in the child looking extremely uncomfortable with their arms and legs sticking straight out… like a starfish.
christy: “look at that poor starfish baby!”

noah: “why won’t you people just carry your godd-mn children?!?”

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