Storm Trooper Syndrome
n. describes a person’s (or group of persons) inability to hit the target with their guns, even at close range. reference from the star wars movies, where the storm troopers tend to have trouble even grazing the rebels with their laser blasters when chasing them down.
these new recruits suffer from the worst case of storm trooper syndrome i’ve ever seen!
n. (sts) a form of mental illness in which the afflicted finds storm troopers to be cool. symptoms include dressing up like a storm trooper often (not just halloween), branding one’s clothing with the star wars imperial logo, joining storm trooper fan clubs, and blowing all of one’s money on star wars conventions. subjects often think that their immature fantasies of being a storm trooper actually make them cool.
there are 4 stages of storm trooper syndrome severity.
stage 1: commonly known as being “storm-curious”. lasts from 1 day to 4 weeks.
stage 2: early onset sts. lasts 1 month to 1 year.
stage 3: college sts. (18-23 yrs old) often thought to be beyond help at this stage.
stage 4: terminal sts. a progression of stage 3 sts. patient has either graduated/dropped out of college, now has a drug dependency and realizes they wasted their college years pretending to be a storm trooper. often seen sleeping in cardboard boxes.
sts is a real condition. if you notice a loved one displaying any of these symptoms get them help immediately.
did you see that guy at the bar last night dressed up as a storm trooper? at first i thought i forgot my halloween costume, then i realized it was june and that he was suffering from storm trooper syndrome.
hey do you remember that tall guy from the party? yeah the one with college storm trooper syndrome. apparently he wears that storm trooper coat he made everywhere he goes.
that homeless guy in the gutter over there, poor guy suffers from stage 4 storm trooper syndrome. apparently he wasted his time in college, was banking on being the star of “storm troopers the musical” play was never even written. now he just tells stories about the battle of alderaan, and his escape from the death star.
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