Student Film


9/10 times, a student film involves:
– zombies
– the homeless
– suicide or death in a dramatic light
– a short story they didn’t write
– alarm clocks
– the stalest of actors
– needless exploitation of available resources (slow motion, racking focus for no reason, fancy credit t-tles)
– poser pablum
– blunt and painful symbolism
– an epic tale constrained to 5 minutes
– copyrighted music used without permission, probably radiohead or sigur ros
– terrible sound or terrible shots (usually sound, rarely both)

9/10 times, a student piece sucks b-lls.

the 10th time, the time that it doesn’t suck b-lls, it’s probably a comedy.
did you see that student film about the kid with a literal crutch, but his crutch was also his mother? and when he told her how she’s his crutch he threw his crutch on the ground and walked off? deep man… deep.
something that is terrible, but the one who made/owns it won’t shut up about how great it is.

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