Susie’s Checkmate

everyone knows that when two lesbians, in a relationship, cannot stop fighting over which one gets to be the butch, they have to have a tiebreaker to come to a final conclusion. this tie breaker consists of one rug-muncher sticking a randomly chosen object into her v-g-n-. after completing this initial act, the other fur-burger bandit must repeat the previous whisker-biscuit eater’s random act of object insertion. as this tiebreaker continues, the objects become larger, and more obscure, until one half of the “d-ld- duo” cannot totally engulf something the other one did; thus creating a single elimination, one letter game, of dike horse.
with that being said…a “suisie’s checkmate” occurs when lesbian #1 offers a medium sized zucchini as her second choice of object, after just completing round one with a small, but textured, mini mag-lite handle. knowing that lesbian #2 will have no problem with the zucchini, but will take her slightly longer to fully engulf, she then positions herself behind the anti pole-smoker, and proceeds to use wwf super star sergeant slaughter’s “cobra clutch” to render her unconscious. finally lesbian #1 squats over lesbian #2’s face, and pees all over her face as hard as she can (female cat style). thus doing so, lesbian #1 marks her territory over lesbian #2, and is crowned the “butch dike” of the relationship.
marla and janine had been dating for about six months. their love for each other was obviously undeniable. unfortunately, the all-too-common lesbian relationship quandary presented itself, and they could not agree on who was the “butch” of their relationship. like all female h-m-s-xual couples presented with this problem, they proceeded with an internationally sanctioned dover dual. unfortunately, what janine did not realize, was how compet-tive and cut-throat her masculine, yet quite demure, lover marla was. janine proceeded to attempt a medium sized zucchini, when out of nowhere marla pounced on her from behind and gave her a “susie’s checkmate” . nationally criticized dover dual referee bob combo ruled it a clean win, and marla was dubbed “king strap-on pitcher” of the relationship. after coming to, janine stood up (p-ss dripping off her ear lobes) and realized she was doomed to be the “rubber-fist catcher”, for the remainder of their female fiasco.