Terrorist By Proxy
1. commonly -ssociated with hipsters, sleeper cells normally found in close proximity to coffee houses.
2. main -rs-nal include a standard issue macbook pro, or anything apple related.
3. apparel include neon in copious quant-ties, possibly a scarf made to look older than it actually is, and thick black frame gl-sses.
4. personal value: champion obscurity above all else. instinctively attempt to articulate matters beyond their actual comprehension, and inflate their own ego or intelligence.
5. an annoying sense of ent-tlement paralleled with the absence of real accomplishments.
6. due to their negative disposition, they are innately and superficially drawn towards the entropic breakdown of society, the very same society that fuels their secret consumerist desires. will take the side of anyone, including terrorists, that oppose american ideals.
how to defeat a terrorist by proxy: question their accomplishments, threaten their intelligence, and understand that their responses are based off a lack of expertise. be wary they may supply unrelated information and statistics to derail your argument; to counter this, accuse them of hipster-ism to derail their own argument. finally, any response provided thereafter will only provide holes in their platform. make sure to declare victory, also make sure to remind them of their own pathetic state.
noah tate is the archetypal terrorist by proxy that embodies these beliefs.
-someone makes comment about terrorists-
noah tate ignorantly defends terrorists: “are people that ignorant to put a generalization on a peaceful group of people. every single muslim was peaceful and dedicated their lives to helping people. the media is corrupting peoples’ beliefs. what happened with the red scare and the communists?”
triggerhands: “sometimes stereotypes are right, that’s how i know back people don’t like mayonaise, you are starting to sound like a terrorist yourself.”
noah tate: “any muslim in america moved here to escape their country and live a peaceful life.”
triggerhands: “so you are burdened by a higher education?”
noah tate: “i obviously wasn’t trying to make myself seem more intelligent than you, your insults are non-effective, i’m not even going to read whatever arrogance you post next.”
triggerhands: win.
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