textured stranger
m-st-rb-t–n technique where the user sits on his hand palms facing a slotted chair (metal grill chairs work best) until said hand falls asleep. person then furiously m-st-rb-t-s with numb hand duplicating the sensation of getting a hand job from a person with textured gloves.
last night i was in the garage so i gave myself a textured stranger.
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- viking grasp
when someone grabs your d-ck like their shaking hands and jerks it up and down in that same manner causing the receiver to -j-c-l-t- blood. viking grasp – see above
- san francisco knife fight
a contest in which the two contestants m-st-rb-t- while holding hands and keeping continuous eye contact. the person who finishes first wins. bored at the bus station, my friend and i decided to take part in a little game of san francisco knife fighting. i can’t believe he finished without blinking once!
- crass destruction
a m-ss destruction, but done by a car accident, such as crashing into a wall and breaking it, a large car accident with many vehicles involved, etc. my mom is a genius and created a cr-ss destruction in the parking garage.
- die in a bloody hole
when someone needs to die a a hole filled with their own blood a sorrow and hatred you need to die in a bl–dy hole
- noncident
a traffic jam that appears to be caused by a traffic incident, however when one reaches the end there is no evidence of any incident whatsoever. i was stuck in a traffic jam for 10 minutes that turned out to be a noncident.