The Munchkin King

the self-proclaimed ruler of sykes (if needed look up definition for “sykes”. it, because the s-x of the king cannot be determined, walks the floor of sykes preying on anyone that shows any glimpse of fun, or hope of having fun, the very notion of fun even! you might not see it for it waddles around too short to be seen by normal statured humans. the only way you might notice it is that the smell of it or the horrible cackling laughter that it spews while feasting on the aforementioned fun. we refer to it as “king” because the “munchkin it” just doesn’t begin to describe the fear and power it seems to think it commands. however “it” would be a more appropriate t-tle to better represent the appearance and actual level of power it has. everyone lives in fear of it though because of its superb stalking powers. it sneaks up and spies on you when you least expect it and if you are doing something that it disapproves of it will cling to to and slowly start to suck the life out of you. the only way to fight the leeching power of it is to realize that you are a more advanced life form and you are in no way intimidated by this vertically challenged, large m-ssed creature. eventually the population around you will notice it leeching off of you and begin to realize also that they have no reason to fear it, and begin to behave like the more advanced lifeforms that they are. that will send it into a demension of anger that it has never realized before, however it’s low capacity for feelings and general knowledge will put too much pressure on it’s vital organs and it will explode. ending all the hatred and world hunger, making the world a better place without it.
i was surfing the web today, but the munchkin king noticed and now i’m slowly dying of it’s leeching.
the self-proclaimed ruler of sykes (if needed look up definition for “sykes”. it, because the s-x of the king cannot be determined, walks the floor of sykes preying on anyone that shows any glimpse of fun, or hope of having fun, the very notion of fun even! you might not see it for it waddles around too short to be seen by normal statured humans. the only way you might notice it is that the smell of it or the horrible cackling laughter that it spews while feasting on the aforementioned fun. we refer to it as “king” because the “munchkin it” just doesn’t begin to describe the fear and power it seems to think it commands. however “it” would be a more appropriate t-tle to better represent the appearance and actual level of power it has. everyone lives in fear of it though because of its superb stalking powers. it sneaks up and spies on you when you least expect it and if you are doing something that it disapproves of it will cling to to and slowly start to suck the life out of you. the only way to fight the leeching power of it is to realize that you are a more advanced life form and you are in no way intimidated by this vertically challenged, large m-ssed creature. eventually the population around you will notice it leeching off of you and begin to realize also that they have no reason to fear it, and begin to behave like the more advanced lifeforms that they are. that will send it into a demension of anger that it has never realized before. however, because of it’s low capacity for feelings and general knowledge, the stress from the anger will place too much pressure on it’s vital organs and it will explode. ending all the hatred, war, and hunger in the world, making earth, nay the universe, a better place without it.
i was having fun surfing the internet, but then the munchkin king saw me and now i feel like i’m slowly dying.