tofurkey


a turkey of the rare tofu species, found only in remote regions of nepal. each tofurkey was born merely as a slab of tofu. only 1 in 500 will sprout feet at age 2, and subsequently gain other turkish characteristics. each tofurkey has but one goal in life, and that is to be approved by the tnaovftwnoa (tofurkey national -ssociation of vegetarian food that was nevertheless once alive). once approved, tofurkeys must rigorously study a language. those who study english are sent to either the northeast or california, where most ameriveggies reside. once they complete their migration, around the end of november, they are promptly skinned of any exterior non-tofulike characteristics, and served to the unknowing public.
johnny finkelstein was raised a jewish tofurkey. as he migrated to america to complete his final life task, he tried not to travel on sat-rdays.
when a person bowls 3 spares in a row in a bowling game. it’s kind of like getting turkey in bowling, but not as good. similar to how tofurkey is kind of like eating a turkey, but not as good.
guy 1: “yo dude check it out!”
guy 2: “check what out? you only got a spare”
guy1: “yeah but that’s 3 in a row, i got a tofurkey”
guy2: “yeah well do it with strikes, than that’ll be something to brag about”
1) slang for turkey.

2) tofu that is shaped like a turkey.
1) tofurkey? shizzle! i’ll make craizizzleberry and some bizach-slapped potatoes, yo!

2) i wasn’t talking slang, you moron! i was talking about tofu shaped like a turkey!
a traditional thanksgiving meal; tofu molded as a shaped of a turkey.
good thing jack prepared tofurkey for thanksgiving, because none of his guests eat meat.
1. tofu molded into the shape of a turkey.

2. anything that is cool, hip, funky, or has a resemblence to tofu.
1. we ain’t be having no real turkey fo thanksgiving. only tofurkey.

2. gotta get my girl something tofurkey.
1. tofu shaped in a turkey.

2. anything that is cool, hip, funky, or has a resemblence to tofu.
1. we ain’t be having a real turkey this thanks giving. tofurkey the real way to go.

2. gotta get myself somma that tofurkey.
a synonym for female masturbation.
it’s tofurkey time, b–tch!

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