University of Illinois at Chicago

uic is an acronym: university impossible to complete! uic is located at the chicago campus of university of illinois. (mission impossible for science/medical/technical majors. the exception is music/art history etc majors… majors for fun and to meet the pro bono humanities requirements). if you like a huge school that is too hard, uic is the school for you!
example:

i went to university of illinois at chicago to learn. instead i got kicked out, the mission impossible song stuck in my head, and owe half of my future life earnings.
(uic)an amazing downtown university experience with quality education, conveniently located for internships (…and concerts/ clubs/ shopping/ restaurants etc!). living off campus with friends is less expensive, and perfect for inviting study groups, and of course throwing parties!

home to the largest population of apparently friendly city pigeons who have the right of way on campus. similarly, students jay walk into traffic any time they darn well please! there’s no uic football team… chicago is sports paradise! go bulls, da bears, cubs or sox, blackhawks! there might be a uic basketball team, but students generally don’t care. there is also an amazing workout facility, but the majority of students are too busy to utilize it.

one of the most diverse universities in the world; aka ‘university of indians and chinese’. this is true of both students and faculty. for example, uic’s world renowned engineering researchers/professors are there because they speak the universal language of math, not because of needless qualifications such as being able to speak english fluently while giving lectures!

chicago’s such a great city, and uic’s an amazingly fun university experience because it’s downtown. parties in chicago also consist of students from many other great universities in the city, such as depaul/loyola!
q:what sports does university of illinois at chicago play?

a:primarily flippy cup, quarters and beer pong!
a school often confused with the university of chicago, an elite private university.

like penn state and upenn, a wealthy and intelligent student body gets screwed over by the name of their college.
“so where did you go to school?”
“the university of chicago.”
“sweet, me too! what fast food restaurant are you working at?”
“no, no, not the university of illinois at chicago. the university of chicago. i got a degree in economics there and now i’m making 120k a year on wall street.”
“oh. would you like fries with that?”