very carefully


a random punchline that can occur in a conversation showing intense mental prowess and wit… it also makes you douche bag number one. totally satirical and not pending to the conversation, you’re random interjection will at least garner a laugh, or at worst stop the conversation awkwardly.

usually this can be followed by an oh snap to make it seem like it was a score for your team. however, like the song that never ends, -n-l s-x, and zylon b, too much will make you hated by your peers and friends.

to use this (use very carefully) is a small step process.

step 1. the question: it must be a question asked using the word how and have a context: how can we accomplish, how can this happen, etc. are acceptable. however, how do these two things relate, how are we different, how much is it? cannot be used unless you wanna randomly f-ck with people.

step 2: upon the person setting up the context, and you cluing in, quickly blurt out the answer: “very carefully” keep in mind that timing is key, 1-2 seconds max, it has to be clear, and concise right after the “setter-upper” asks the question. too late and it will not make sense or someone will provide a different solution, such as a real answer in which case, moots your “very carefully” and will make every one say wtf mate?!!
example:

teacher: how did claudius plan to kill hamlet?

student: very carefully

#2

jessica: how could she’ve done this!!!?

frank: very carefully

jessica slaps frank, and then frank curb stomps the f-ck out of jessica.

#3

chris93: alright guys how are we gonna kill the elite above the tunnel?

myg0tb3rni3: very carefully

myg0tb3rni3 then drops a grenade and kills his team.
generic response to a “how do i” question. in response to either-

1)something the person asking probably can’t do.

2)a question that would take far too much time and effort to answer.
1) q:how do i program an mmorpg?
a: very carefully.

2) q:how do i fix this virus?
a: very carefully.

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