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a suburb outside of portland, oregon.

you might be from west linn if….

-you see escalades, hummers, range rovers, and mercedes everywhere
-your mcdonald’s has a plasma flat screen tv in it
-some of the portland trailblazers live in your city
-the highschool has an atm in it
-the only crime that happens is teenagers egging cars….and it makes the local paper
-the majority of students at the high school drink and/or do drugs, yet they are academically one of the best schools in the state
-the cops have nothing better to do than pulling over people for no real reason
-everyone asks “are you rich?” or something along these lines when you say you are from west linn
-there are hardly any minorities in your city

this is a generalization of wl, but it is pretty true.
west linn is very similar to lake oswego

i am from west linn, i am so cool.
a suburb of portland, or with excessively high land value, oppressive police, and more ways to get lost than any other place.
west linn
a small town in oregon filled with 38% rich, backstabbing, drinking, mean, gossiping, crowd-following white kids, 13% wierd kids trying to be emo and different but all wear black, 17% people who just complain all the time about the first two groups that make up 51%, 33% of people who do their own thing and hang out in their little cliques that are very exclusive, and 9% of people who actually have substance, aren’t materialistic, nice, and genuine. it’s hard to find them though.
west linn is stupid.
a suburb right outside of portland, oregon
you might be from west linn if you see..

1)stretched hummer limos, range rovers, bentlys, escalades

2)we have a starbucks on every block

3)you either see a kid with an iphone, or a juicy

4)when people hear westlinn, they ask if you rich and you try and avoid the question

5)academically, our schools are best in state

6)the most crime that happens is kids sneaking out past curfew and makes the local paper under the police calls

7)our best hang out spot is safeway and we try to make the most fun out of it

8)even though kids do drugs no one seems to find out

and the scary part is, this is all true..
a city outside of portland,or.
this place obviously has a lot of whiny b-tches that cry about everybody being fake, when really they are just kidding themselves. you just have to make the best of things and take your anger out by f-cking around in random stores and throwing sh-t out of your cars at people and at starbucks. and don’t forget to get f-cking wasted. climbing the rooftops and getting the cops called on you for doing awesome sh-t that most of those losers are never gonna get to experience.

the cops have nothing to do except cruise around and steal peoples wheel chairs that they bought fair and square. and it has so many people that say everybody around them are douchebags and fakie preps and don’t realize that its fun being a douchebag.
nerds: everybody here is fake and i cry and m-st-rb-t- myself to sleep everynight cause i can’t get any.

true west linnian: -kicks in b-lls- loser
new money portland suburb. huge bronze statue of batteling stallions. women have fake orange tans and acrylic nails. tasteless and trashy wannabe lake oswego. 105 lb housewives rolln the leased escalade, completely environmentaly unconcious. women with no secondary education, very insecure, and yet try to lord their precieved wealth over others. middle management! these people are so cheesy, all they talk about is money, but west linn aint the west hills!!! people with very little imagination. rolling hills community super church, jesus needs your buck. hummers!!!!!
west linn people are as beige as their mcmansions.
a boring–ss, little town n-body’s ever heard of near portland, oregon. it consists of mostly upper-cl-ss christian white people. a huge method of entertainment (besides getting wasted) is hanging out near safeway, starbucks, and other places of that nature.
west linn idiot: i have a stick up my -ss!

person: must be from west linn.

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