wild deuces



to use a public bathroom without ever being a customer because your colon is about 90 seconds from blowing out. dropping wild deuces usually involves little to no eye contact. at most, the person throwing down will shrug their shoulders evoking a head shake from the employee.
manager: “have you seen the guy in the red hat?”

employee: “yeah – he dropped wild deuces then high-tailed it for the door. when i asked if he needed any help, he just said ‘i’m good’ without ever making eye contact.”

manager: “sh*t – again! wild deuces again! i’m going to go to his house, drop wild deuces, and then just leave without ever saying ‘hi’ to his wife or anything.”

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