311
a group of scat muncher h-m-s-xuals from nebraska who have been pretending to be musicians since the early 1990s.
the group got their name when jim watson, the band’s former guitarist, was charged with sales of scat p-rnography to a minor. one of his neighbors turned him in by calling 311 because of the unusually strong smell of feces coming through the wall.
the band is known for their strong belief in satan and has a reputation for stomping the skulls of live kittens and burning bibles on stage. as a result, they have been banned from playing in most states and within 500 yards of any animal shelter. in 1993 they recorded a song called “omaha stylee” which details their largest bible-burning to date, which also led to their rv being destroyed by fire. rumor has it that the fbi was about to bust them for child p-rnography, so they torched the rv while it was loaded with their entire stash of kiddie p-rn. they are currently working on a new alb-m tentatively t-tled f-cktardation which, according to drummer chad s-xton in a recent interview with gay publication the advocate, is “the only word that fully encomp-sses the impact of 311’s musical career”.
q: hey, did you hear larry craig’s favorite band is 311?
a: i’m not surprised in the least…those guys really put the ‘ghey’ in reggae.
police lingo for indecent exposure
this is charlie bravo golf bravo reporting a 311 at bradywine and nebraska
loud and obscene
man, i can hear her from the other side of the warehouse. you can always tell when 311 is in the building.
the nyc help hotline
if you have any questions, call the cities hotline at 3-1-1
the non-emergency counterpart of 911.
i think we’re lost, call 311.
similar to the number 411 although it can be used in some cities to hear information on community based gatherings i.e concerts and basically checking whats up in your city.
dduude edgar checked 311 this mornin and theres no school man!
a kick -ss band. 311 doesn’t mean kkk. its the police code for indecent exposure
put on your g-d d-mn pants or i’m gunna arest you for indecent exposure!!
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