acquisitionist
a media & software h–rder. a person who’s bandwidth, storage sp-ce, and desire to acquire intellectual property greatly exceed their ability or availability to enjoy even a small percentage of it.
not to be confused with the typical obsessive collector: the acquisitionist distinguishes his or herself by having enough media to require several human lifetimes to even watch / play / listen to it all.
maxwell: hey jorge, want to come over to my house and hang out? i just bought five new terabyte drives and i’ve already loaded them up with 1000 new movies, the entire n64, ps1, ps2 and game cube catalogs, the virgin music catalog, and 10,000 hours of p-rn.
jorge: ok, i guess that might be alright. hey how’s your daughter doing? i hear she’s started walking?
maxwell: i wouldn’t actually know; i’m an acquisitionist now; i tend to spend every waking hour downloading.
jorge: look, i’ve got to be somewhere.
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