Alaskan flat tire


a dog that is either lazy, injured, crippled, or dead. this comes from the fact that dog sleds are a well-known form of transportation in alaska and that if anything bad were to happen to any one of the sled dogs, well, you know, the sled would falter like a car with a flat tire.
“f-ck, my dog’s leg just broke! i’ve got an alaskan flat tire here and i need to rush him to the vet fast!”

or

“hey -sshole, keep your f-cking pooch away from my garden, or else i’ll get my shotgun and turn him into an alaskan flat tire!”

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