1. the realization that no matter how many antihistamines you ingest, you will still be sniffling, sneezing, itching, and eye watering your way through your day – most likely with the added side effects of hyper-activity or sudden-onset narcolepsy from the drugs you’ve just taken.

2. the state of cognitive dysfunction one reaches during the height of allergy season. those who suffer from allergies may lose all semblance of intelligence and/or memory for the duration of their symptoms.
person 1: “how do you think you did on your history midterm?”

person 2: “dude, i was completely allerf-cked! i could barely remember how to spell my name, let alone what year the military junta was formed in nicaragua! i ran out of tissues and d-mn near fell asleep halfway through my essay.”

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