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the alternative to the orange.
today, i do not wish to consume an apple. i shall seek alternative fruits.

my imac g5, an amazing machine.

whats next

imac g4 1ghz

apple computer’s orig logo

the best kind of apple…mmmmm

microsoft sucks.
a horrendous company that has somehow managed to stay afloat for years and appeal to a m-ss of misguided people. they specialize in taking existing technology, making it all shiny and fancy looking, and re-selling it for double the price. ironically, their slogan is “think different”.

their latest and greatest gadget that’s getting all the attention is, of course, the iphone, which is basically comparable to any high-quality $150 phone, except it has “innovative” touch screen technology, and it sells for $600.

apple couldn’t quite figure out how to make an operating system, so they just stole the freebsd kernel and repackaged a b-st-rdized version of it as mac os x. it’s funny that apple brags that it’s “unix-based”, since no one with experience in unix would ever use a mac.

apple frequently runs “clever” ads. although they’ve made a ton of them, all the ads boil down to how windows has viruses and crashes all the time. apple also have an enormous, cult-like fanbase that like to remind us of these things every five seconds. apple fanboys are generally smug, annoying, and arrogant, despite the fact that most of them don’t know jack sh-t about computers.
apple fanboy: “m$ is teh sux0r! apple pwns!”

windows user: “windows has a wide selection of software and games, and a huge developer community.”

apple fanboy: “but it crashes and has viruses lol”

windows user: “my os hasn’t crashed since i had windows me. and avg is a free program that keeps my computer secure.”

apple fanboy: “but windoze suxx!”

windows user: “would you care to tell me about your mac? i hear it doesn’t have many tools for software developers, which are important for my work.”

apple fanboy: “lolololol but windows sucks!!!11”

windows user: “did you know that a great amout of apple software is made with microsoft visual c++?”

apple fanboy: “omg wtf is c++?”
the most bad-ss f-cking fruit on the f-cking planet. seriously, this motherf-cker kicks the sh-t out of the p-ssy orange or banana. this juicy, red motherf-cker is the best f-cking thing that god has ever created. eat an a apple and your d-ck will grow 3 inches. f-ck.
woah, look at that bad-ss over there eating an apple
the truly heinous name of chris martin and gwenyth paltrow’s lovechild.
dear apple,

your father and i are sorry for giving you that truly heinous name.

love,

gwenyth

ps: i hope your therapy sessions are going well.
the result of a mindblowing or humiliating situation in which the victim is posed one question:
how do you like them apples!?
what the f-ck are you looking at the definition of apples for you stupid f-ck?
you should know what apples are
a manufacturer of computers, peripherials, and software with around a 3% share of the pc market.
most well-known products include:
imac
ipod
itunes
os x
final cut pro
ibook

while their operating system’s market share may be significantly below that of microsoft’s windows, many still prefer to use apple’s computers and software, especially for graphical design and audio work.

many people like to debate over the superiority of macs over pcs and visa versa, such people have no lives.
1. “quite frankly, i don’t give a sh-t weather you prefer apple computers or windows pcs.”

2. “the apple vs. pc debate is mindless and insubstantial, try both and use whichever you prefer.”

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