Arai

humourous tamil & malayalam double entendre for:
1. ‘one half’, the fraction 1/2.
2. a brahmin man or a brahmin p-n-s.

based on the 3-4 inch indo-aryan brahmin p-n-s being the smallest male organ in south india, measuring less than the 3/4-sized or ‘mukkal’ 4.5-5.5 inch nordic-iranian indian muslim p-n-s or pakistani p-n-s, which is in turn well below the full-sized or ‘muzhu’ 6-12 inch negroid-australoid dravidian p-n-s.

this gradation has severe consequences for brahmanism in s. india. thus, it leads to the continuous outflow of brahmin women via intercaste marriages. the attraction of the ‘pappathi’ for the ‘thulukkan’ is two-fold, for not only is the ‘thulukka-lingam’ larger than the ‘pappu-lingam’, but desensitizing islamic circ-mcision greatly lengthens the duration of the act of ‘kama’. this islamophile trend is high-lighted by the kalpana iyer-amjad khan affair & the example of suhasini swamy, d/o janata party pres. subramanian swamy, who married a muslim.

however, true brahmini size queens naturally resort to dravidas. this fatal attraction is amply depicted in tamil cinema, as in ‘saamy’ (2003, tamil hero saamy weds a brahmin girl bhuvana), ‘sethu’ (1999, tamil hero vikram has an affair with ‘pappathi’ abitha), & ‘mouna guru’ (2011).

thus brahmanas are forced to focus on mental pursuits, producing maths wizard like srinivasa ramanujan & n-bel prize winners like c v raman, s chandrasekhar & v ramakrishnan.
1) vaidyanathan iyer: i wish i was a thulukkan, then i’d have a somewhat bigger mukkal 3/4 instead of my puny arai, & i could enjoy long-lasting s-x with fine pappathis!

2) when swamy showed his arai to the hot pappathi actress, she laughed.

3) iyengar: i need tweezers to m-st-rb-t- my arai!

4) lakshmi iyer: sorry, my dear pappan husband. but your arai is not doing it for me tonight! go and find me a muzhu, or at least a mukkal!

5) raavan: how small is your arai?
pundit: 3 inches when hard!
raavan: haha!
pundit: that’s big for a brahmin boy!