archaeologist


a person who studies the past from the material culture left behind by humans.
a popular misconception is that they study fossils or dinosaurs (this is paleantology)but this is not true. many male archaeologists have beards, and they are considered as “weird” from most of the population.
” that samien dish seems to be from the 4th century ad not the 3rd. you can tell by the potters stamp, and look at layer it is in.”
or
“archaeology can you dig it”
or
“archaeology, it’s dirty and we like it”
or
“archeology a career in ruins”
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someone who gets paid to dig through dead people’s garbage.
archaeologists love excavating trash middens and looking at layers of dirt.
a person who studies the past via the evaluation of artifacts, ecofacts, and geofacts. archaeologists do not study dinosaur bones. archaeologists do have to navigate through a maze of red tape in order to study said items due to the fact that political correctness and all around silliness have created ridiculous laws that impede scientific study so that peoples feelings do not get hurt.
archaeologist: “wow i just found a site that has 20,000 yr old human remains, these human remains and all the artifacts found with him could tell us how and when humans came to north america, this could be the most important find in the last century”

random government/tribal official: that is too bad, because even though these remains are 20,000 years old i still believe they could be a native american ancestor and therefore i am going to prevent you from studying anything at this site so i can make sure that the government pays to just rebury everything. sorry for your bad luck but my feelings come before breakthrough studies beneficial to all humans”
a woman that dates much older men not for monetary gain e.g. someone who dusts off old bones.
he’s not even rich, she must be an archaeologist.
most commonly found scr-ping dirt off dinosaur bones, archaeologists are the girl guides of social science. can always be relied upon to carry obscure equipment, which makes them useful in everyday situations and absolutely essential in case of attack by the undead.
social anthropologist: “if only i could somehow get level with those runes lining the walls of the pit i could translate them!”
token archaeologist: “i have some rope and a harness in my bag.”

person in street: “i’m having a heart attack!”
p-ssing archaeologist: “here, take my spare defibrillator.”
a scientist who digs up fossils and studies them
ummmm…sorry cant think of one…. ross geller?

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