asian driver


-sshole who gets on freeway at a lightning fast 23.2 mph causing major havoc at on-ramp. they then instantly shoot over to fast lane with no regard for use of mirrors or turn signals causing multiple people to lock up their brakes, and numerous near misses as cars have to swerve to avoid them. they then proceed to break speed records as they travel at thewhopping speed of 45 mph in the fast lane all the while with left turn signal now on continuously….they seem to have immunity to the middle finger, most people would get upset at several hundred people giving them the bird, but not the asian driver.{perhaps they dont see it, how could that be possible?}.
there are several species of asian driver….the young americanized asian driver can be recognized by the cars they drive…lowered j-panese ricers with hood scoops, 8 inch exhausts that make more noise than an f-15 at full afterburner, they are always lowered and have more unreadable decals than a nascar. but the #1 giveaway is a 9 inch tachometer mounted directly in front of the drivers face on the a-pillar.
the most deadly type of asian driver is the fob female, they can be identified by gl-sses thicker than the hubble telescope, or on sunny days by the wearing of a welding sheild and white cotton gloves{to keepp their skin fair, ive been told} avoid contact with this type at all costs, they have been known to be able actually roll a car doing less than 3 mph on flat and level ground with no other vehicles involved.
this is being posted as a public service, learned from years of experience. some other sure signs that can help you spot an asian driver are
1 they make a left turn from the right lane
2 both hands on wheel in death grip
3 head never moves from straight ahead posistion ex: like checking mirrors
4 red and gold thing with t-ssels hanging from rear view mirror, blocking yet even more of thier already severly limited field of view
5 flower pattern seat covers and doillie things near rear window
6 numerous dings scr-pes and dents on b-mpers and doors, tire sidewall is completely scr-pped off. this is caused by many botched attempts st parrallel parking

if ever involved in accident with asian driver, be forewarned….they will not speak english. they can, but they wont, hoping that in your frustration at their feigned jibberish you will just leave…therefore not reporting accident allowing them to keep undeserved drivers license. the other tactic they use is they will claim to thier insurance co. that you hit them.even though you have a crushed rear b-mper and their hood is bent and it happened on a freeway.
i have a great idea “licenses for illegals?” im all for that on one condition…every license given to a mexican…take one away from an asian!!! the world would be a safer place
i was warming my car up in my driveway and an asian driver broadsided me
the reason air bags were invented
look at the asian driver doing 40 in the fast lane
noun. asian person who sits in a car behind the steering wheel with their foot on the gas..(rarely). they can be seen driving like a drunken maniac and do not understand english. if you see an asian woman driving, get the f-ck off the road.
most asian driver’s eyes are 3/4 closed, no wonder they drive like sh-t.

you can blindfold most asians with dental floss.

the most common type of car in china is a courtesy car.
the stereotypical slow driver who drives at 40 km/h (25 mph) in canada and the u.s. on the fast lane because the lanes are too wide. however, it is the opposite situation back in asia. in asia (especially hong kong), the asian driver is the one who makes unneccesary lane changes at over 120 km/h (75 mph) by signalling too fast and not shoulder checking on extremely ridiculous narrow lanes. however, they are somehow so pro that hong kong’s accident rate is so low. but still, foreigners driving in hong kong are suspectible to accidents.
surely, these asian drivers may be idiots here in vancouver doing 40k on the p-ssing lane. but when i rented a car in hong kong, couldn’t believe they are so wrecklessly fast!
a race of people that have the ability to design and build great car’s but yet they lack the skill to drive them

have the ability to p-ss off english, spanish speakers
asian drivers are

erratic

fail to indicate
drive at rediculas speed
fail to obey road rules
fail to stop at stop sign
kurb mag wheels
50 % vision at all times
fail to understand english

have the ability to p-ss off locals
-american rice-rocketeer: these are young, american born asians who drive supped-up j-panese cars with weird lights, extra gauges, custom rims, and a lowered car. they are most annoying on the freeway, where they drive in the middle lane at 60mph and always keep a 40 car distance between themselves and the car in front of them. they also have the fascinating tendency to not base their speed off of what their speedometer says, but by who is trying to p-ss them. this leads to them speeding up when you approach and slowing down when you get stuck and have to slow. sometimes, rice-rocketeers trade in their brethren’s cars and buy bmw’s. however, they still act the same way. also, it must be noted that this particular breed of asian driver has the curious tendency of backing their car up into parking sp-ces as opposed to driving into them. this always results in about 5 re-tries that hold up other parkers waiting their turn, and also tends to lead to a poor parking job with their car twisted or crooked in the sp-ce. no known answer for this strange, seemingly detrimental ritual has yet been found.
hey look, theres an asian driver with a pointlessly decked out mazda, it must belong to a rice rocketeer. he could prolly smoke any of us with that car!

no way man, he’s going 62mph, and he’s gonna keep going 62mph.

what a fricken waste of a supped up engine then!
asian drivers are drivers just like everyone else. but for some strange reason, white people like to think that asians are not good at driving. it is unknown how this untrue rumor came to be, but it is just another stereotype perpetuated by americans because their lives are so empty and worthless that they need to make fun of other people.
i am an asian driver and i have not gotten in a wreck or have gotten ticketed ever. but, according to americans, because i’m asian i am immediately a bad driver.

good logic, no wonder america is full of idiots…

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