baby napper
one who ‘naps’ (kidnaps) babies. baby nappers are usually the ones who you know best, such as really good friends and family. they creep in the bushes outside your windows at night waiting for that opportune moment to nap your baby.
they try to make it seem like everything is ok, like saying “i only want to see him/her for a moment”, or “you can have him/her back”. of course you can have him/her back, she is your child. why would your friend need to let you know you can have your child back? strange huh?
when the bush-napping doesn’t work, they usually use a more subtle approach. such as always asking to see your baby, always wanting to baby sit.
you can’t trust anyone with your baby! you never know who is a baby napper.
on the phone with a friend:
you: so tired. zoey slept for about 4 hours and that’s it. she’s in a mommy’s girl mood though and i love it. she’s so cuddly and cute and has given me lots of kisses today.
friend: i miss her… bring her to me!!!
you: um no…baby napper! 🙂
friend: umm..fool, you can have her back!! but i havent seen that cute little monster in forever!!
you: the definition of baby napper says that you’d say that. 🙁
friend: fine…fine….
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