using a common friend as a secondary way to communicate to your girlfriend/boyfriend the things that are uncomfortable for you discuss directly with your girlfriend/boyfriend.
“hey steph! you’re my back channel! what does lisa like as far as engagement rings go?”
getting someone’s personal contact information so you don’t have to communicate with them through a public means.
we were having a conversation on a public web site, but i wanted to backchannel her so we could get more personal.

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