Bartender

a drunk’s best friend at the moment
drunk: the bartender is my best friend
guy: what the h-ll?
a temporary pharmacist with limited stock
i am a bartender, i cure people’s problems
a professional babysitter. a part time psychologist. one who has a developed sense of seeing through the bullsh-t. someone you are most likely not taking home, so do your bartender a favor and don’t ask! remember, she is getting paid to flirt with you and being hot is part of the requirement of her job!! a professional bullsh-tter. someone with a real sense of fun and can probably drink you under the table. a person with a dangerous turning point who can rip you to shreds with a few pointed sentences if necessary. a part time security guard. i may be cute but will kick your drunk -ss if i have to!!
drunk: “you’re hot.”
bartender: “thanks, you’re not to bad yourself.”
drunk: “you got all kinds of booty girl!”
bartender: politely smiles

drunk: “we should go out sometime.”
bartender: (after tab is paid of course) “no thanks i like p-ssy.” (in other words: you are wasted, i am sober, i have witnessed you hit on every girl in this bar and will not be your last resort to get laid. no thanks drunk guy..)
1. song made by t-pain ft. akon
2. a person who serves drinks at a bar
1. lyrics: broke up with my girl last night so i went to the club…

2. the bartender served me 2 gl-sses of beer.
a term used to describe back-to-back home runs in a baseball game. most notably heard by sportscenter anchor neil everett calling out a back-to-back jack highlight.
“matt carpenter goes deep to lead off the game. carlos beltran wants in on the fun, bartender! one shot ain’t enough.”
a song by dave matthews band, the most famous version of which can be heard on the live at folsom field alb-m.
bartender please/ fill my gl-ss for me/ with the wine you gave jesus that set him free after 3 days in the ground
a person accustomed to the mixing of words.
dude, stop being a bartender. just spit it out.

1
2
next ›
last »