binning

‘binning’ is the art of leaning a bin on the outside of an inward opening door. the bin must be placed at a certain angle so that when the door is opened the bin will fall and create a startling noise and a characteristic -bang-, the decibal output of which depends on the material the bin is constructed of. this technique of ‘binning’ was invented and developed by the now legendary uk stealth binning corp®. the idea behind the prank is that whoever falls victim to a ‘binning’ cannot punish those involved as they will have dispersed to an appropriate rendezvous point thus being able to deny any involvement in the binning incident. different binning techniques show different levels of respect. a tall metal bin is the most lethal as this disperses the most rubbish and creates the most startling noise. a plastic bin with a bin bag should not disperse much rubbish therefore being less problomatic for the victim (a sign that you respect the victim more than the victim of a metal binning). other materials have not yet been field tested but are currently under development. these include the mk2 metal bin stack and the wooden laundry bin but information on these techniques will not be released until they have been adequatly tested. the art of binning was created as a action of jest which entailed a bin being placed against a toilet cubical door so after “unleashing their load” would have a bin fall down, but the art was soon lost and never used again. it was later rediscovered a month later and was deployed as a method of punishment to reap revenge on mr boyce (a sk-nky, sweaty, bearded, fat c-nt). the most dangerous binning that ever transpired was a ‘wheely bin’ of which was set on fire and then placed against the door of somebodies place of residence in the middle of the night.
that, ladies and gentleman, boys and girls is the art or binning. thanks for reading.
imagine…
your a teacher in your cl-ss. your alone finishing some paperwork. the bell goes for lunchtime. you hear the occasional group of youths run past shouting but other than that its fairly quiet. about ten minutes into break, you hear a rustle at your closed door. you think nothing of it and carry on working. but then just 10 seconds after, theres a knock at the door. you hoist yourself up and walk over to the door. as you get to the door your sixth sense kicks in and you know somethings wrong. if it was a teacher they would’ve walked straight in after knocking. so you figure it must be a student. you gather up your teachers authority, rise up on your heels to look taller and open the door to confront whoever is on the other side. then, out of nowhere…

a f-cking bin falls down… rubbish flys everywhere. the people outside the cl-ssroom burst into laughter and you feel so incedibly small compared to the powerful bin that just fell by your feet!!!!

ladies and gentlemen, the art, of door binning!!! -takes a bow, bins a door-

(additional notes: use a metal bin not a plastic one as it makes a louder bang and you can hear it further down the corridor if you have to make a quick getaway.)

-ssistance…if caught setting up a bin, simply say you were moving it to a more appropriate location, if your caught by a door thats about to be binned, say your testing some physics and the pattern of gravity then to add insult to injury, knock on the door to prove that gravity exists then for that added thrill run away.
the art of stoping along side a wheelie bin full of rubbish on the side of a residentual street, the p-ssenger of the vehicle leans out of the window and grabs hold of the handle, leaving the wheels of the bin still on the ground.
the driver of the vehicle accelerates to around 80km/h & once a sutible car parked on the side of the road is found, the p-ssenger lets go of the bin, causing it to collide with the rear of the car, thus causing alot of damage to the parked car, and rubbish strewn all over the road.
what did you guys do last night?

ah not much, just went binning.

what’s that?

well we launch wheelie bins into the -ss end of cars at high speed.