Bissip
the bissip is a lonely person, lacking in any real social skills and barely leads a real life of their own.
usually, they live either with several cats, or are still with their parents even though they’re in their mid-late 50’s.
they tend to sit at home all day eating crisps and watching things like jeremy kyle, loose women, judge judy, the wright stuff, jerry springer & ricki lake on tv.
they leave the house only occasionally, usually for more crisps and more biscuits, sugar and milk for their tea.
while out they sometimes frequent a café where they talk about jeremy kyle, loose women, judge judy, the wright stuff, jerry springer & ricki lake with other bissips.
more than often, the conversation turns to real people that they’ve never actually met, but they heard about in the street from another bissip. it’s usually about a friend’s friend’s cousin who knows a guy who’s related to someone who lives miles away.
they then budgie talk and cluck about this unknown person for an hour, getting nowhere except for communal ‘tutting’.
they often don’t realise that this train of conversation is rude, abrasive and impolite.
if anyone mentions that they are being rude or impolite, they turn the conversation to how rude that person is for saying so.
they then decide to go home on the bus so they can watch live from studio five, eastenders, casualty, coronation street, emmerdale and reality tv that stars various z-list celebrities.
bissip: made up of biddy and gossip.
shut up gertrude, you’re being a bissip
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