Blackpool


a town in the north west of england, approximately 50 miles from manchester.blackpool is without a shadow of a doubt the most dismal,suicide provoking and disgusting places you will ever visit.
i heard the uk government were planning to test nuclear weapons in blackpool in the hope it might kill some of the sc-m that live there.
cheap town, average wage is 10 grand a year. kids are encouraged to drop out of school at 16, work on the prom selling 2 quid shoes and then retire at 21 and live on the dole, stabbing grannies for crack money.
makes ghetto areas in london look like vegas.
the greatest place on earth.

the vegas of the uk
it’s a f-cking dump, folkes
sea side resort in the uk. known for it’s lack of clean water in the sea which makes legs dissolve, and the big one (rollercoaster)
(1942) my family is so fortunatewe get to go to blackpool this year.

(modern day) my family is so poor, we have to go to blackpool this year.
soul-destroying grey seaside town which has cleaner sewage than beach water.

has the highest number of drug addicts in uk.

high rate of litter.

has at least 2 cash converters, where you can convert stolen goods into drugs.

blackpool tower, the rejected offspring of the eifel tower, which has unique magnetic properties that not only attract metallic bling, but also baseball caps and tracksuits from around the country. (unlike the eifel tower, which attracts tourists from around the globe).

a brilliantly named “bargain booze” can be found on almost every street.

ranks somewhere in the middle of the top ten worst towns / cities for unemployment.

residents typically support man utd. however, when the local team started to squeeze its way into the premier league, many became “dual” supporters of both teams.

common local slang includes “‘ere ye are” which typically translates to “excuse me”, but can also be used alternatively when antagonizing someone. (emphasis on the “h” not being pr-nounced).

whistling is considered a talent.

only place in the uk where you’ll hear / see more fireworks on the 4th november than you will on the 5th.

speaking in basic english, not smoking, or not acting like a general tw-t will render you a “posh c-nt”.

war memorial now gets traditionally desecrated at least once a year, as of last decade.

hordes of generic, big-eared youths.
typical blackpool chav: “‘ere ye are m8 you gorra spare f-g?”

presumed “posh c-nt”: “no, i don’t smoke”

typical blackpool chav: “‘ere ye are, you taking the p-ss? ‘ere ye are, ‘ere ye are, ‘ere ye are”.
#sh-thole #chavs #junkies #heroin #binge drinking #r-t-rds #jeremy kyle #inbreeding #gambling #manchester united #w-ngster #cuddly toy
a truly magnificiant hotspot in the uk. the number one seaside resort clocks up more visitors than anywhere else in the uk. it is that good, you have to feel sorry for the nearby places such as preston. a lot of people who visit preston to watch their respective team play football end up staying in blackpool for a weekend. this consequently means lost revenue for preston. however, this is just a sign of how good blackpool is. with the further development of casinos and modernising the pier, blackpool will always remain one of the great towns in the uk.
pleasure beach, third biggest attraction in europe
a seaside town situated on the north west coast of england. blackpool is populated mainly by chavs who live off benefits and spend their days har-ssing people and drinking cheap cider. the main street leading into town (central drive) is a complete sh-t hole full of layabouts and druggies and filthy boarded up shops. i wouldn’t recommend walking there after dark. blackpool hobbies include begging, arson, drug abuse, alcoholism and har-ssment. most kids don’t go to school, they prefer to spend their days dressed in filthy rags riding down the main roads on their stolen bmx bikes while their mothers are in the pub with the latest “uncle”.
i went to blackpool for my holidays and it was sh-t.
#chavs #benefits #drug abuse #begging #arson
a sc-mmy sea-side town which is apparently better than king’s lynn. the lovely accents of the people who live there, the wonderful sights to see. probably one good school in the whole place and that is full of crack-heads and stoners.

the people who go there on holiday are either really scr-ping the barrel or they are jack and vera duckworth.
“wow. blackpool is so much better than king’s lynn!” an old lynner.
“yeah. the sk-nky sea, the poor inhabitants, the urchin children. the list of great things about blackpool is endless!”
#blackpool #king’s lynn #sc-m #sea-side town #don’t go

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