blooffamu
name: blooffamu
diet: lettuce, red bull
allergies: lettuce
colour: rainbow
blood: gold (ichor, blood of the gods)
size: emu with a large head
place of origin: south america easter island
birthdate: summer of 1997
population: 1
facts: -has neck pains due to immensely large head
-can only say bloop because it was the first thing it heard
-the reason for that is because it was born moments after the infamous ‘bloop’ was emitted near the easter island
-also make the sound “blurp” when twisting its tongue sideways
-at birth, the mother emu exploded (using laws of physics)
-the buffalo father was suspected to have abandoned the mother in shame that he mated with a bird
-it sucks up cans of red bull regularly to grow wings
-it’s head is very droopy and hard to lift, so that’s why there’s a pair of wings of its head to support it
-it headb-tts things to knock them down
-it was discovered quickly, because it flew around to other countries saying bloop
-although it eats lettuce, < the lettuce is named romaine hearts it is allergic to it---scientists are not certain how it stays alive, and plans on extracting blooffamu alleles to help people build a resistance against allergies
me: have you seen my pet blooffamu?
someone else: your what?
me: smh -.-
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