Blotis
an adjective used to describe a woman who is beyond being morbidly obese. a blotis can be identified by whether or not matter in close proximity to the woman is drawn inward due to her m-ssive gravitational pull, quite similar to a black hole. if you see a blotis in public, avoid her at all costs. coming within the event horizon of a blotis is fatal and there is no escape.
a blotis has an overwhelming need to consume all matter in the universe.
a blotis may be near-by if you can physically feel the ground trembling or there is a sudden rupture in the sp-ce-time continuum. in the event of such misfortune the best course of action is to find shelter in the nearest gym.
avoid public places such as fast-food restaurants and theme parks, unless you with to study a blotis in it’s natural habitat.
it is speculated that when a blotis absorbs a critical m-ss of matter she will become a super-m-ssive blotis, which would mark the worlds ending.
-at first she was morbidly obese, then the doctors started cl-ssifying her as a blotis.
-hey man watch out!
-whoa! thanks man, that blotis almost got me.
-mommy what is that blotis doing outside our house?
-stay away from the windows! i’m going to lock all the doors and call the cops. g-d help us.
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