bowling green massacre
one of the worst terrorist attacks that never happened.
i will never forget where i wasn’t during the bowling green m-ssacre.
a special night in kellyanne conway’s life in which she was consensually double penetrated by 2 iraqi refugees at bowling green state university. it is reported that she moaned the words “allah akbar” for nearly 3 hours straight during the event. despite the fact that she could never quite walk the same again, multiple sources report that it was the best night of her life. unfortunately, the 2 iraqi refugees never called her again after that night, which she still hasn’t gotten over.
kellyanne conway: “i’m very disappointed that the bowling green m-ssacre didn’t get covered by the media. well…at least i got covered by 2 iraqis!”
Read Also:
- cocktor beam
much like a tractor beam that we see in sci fi movies, a c-cktor beam is what girls get caught in when they’re near their boyfriend/crush/husband or really anyone that’s giving them s-xy vibes or actual c-ck. we’re not gonna see karen again for a while. she’s caught up in steve’s c-cktor beam.
- ambienated
when you sleep eat, walk, cook, call, shave your cat, watch tv, wrap presents after taking ambien, before falling asleep, which you may or may not remember or do correctly this morning i found eggs in the microwave that i must have made last night when i was ambienated but i forgot to eat.
- double snap
when someone sends you a snapchat, but share the same snapchat in their snap story at the same time. weirdly annoying. double-snappers are sh-tty people -man, this shorty just double snapped me. what a basic bish “i know, right!? that’s some bs”
- asumpttorian
a person who adds in parts to a story or thinks they know the ending of a story they know nothing about as they are hearing it for the first time. don’t be an asumpttorian while listening to my story.
- jade/passion
a girl that changes your perspective on life, upon meeting her you find out she has an alter ego who transcends reality. i was at the wedding and met jade/p-ssion, my life has a new meaning. although she is kind of a lightweight, i wonder who is the alchy between jade/p-ssion.