Breastaliser
a drunkeness test that can be used on men, which is much cheaper than a breathaliser. all you need to do to judge how much he’s had to drink is to get a girl with large b–bs to ask him a question and then see how long it takes him to look up at her face and answer.
1 second is normal
2 seconds is about 3 pints
3 or more is hammered
“dude, you look a bit drunk, i think i’d better drive.”
“nah, don’t be stufid, i’m prefectly okydoke to, um, drive.”
“no way man i’d better use the breastaliser on you. mich-lle, get your -ss over here!”
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