british culture

this article refers to english subculture. virtually n-body in england refers to the country as britain, but for some reason, most americans do, so hopefully this t-tle will help the americans among us find what they’re looking for.
it’s a worldwide misconception that english culture revolves heavily around tea, bowler hats, walking canes, deducing things and saying little idioms like “spiffing!” and “tally-ho old chap!”.
this is infact, not the case.
sadly, britain is becoming more and more like america every day, due to the majority of television shows being aired coming from the usa.
yes we drink tea, but we also drink as much, if not more coffee.
you will never hear anybody say “spiffing!” or some similar phrase except if they are the living dead from the 1900’s, or being sarcastic.
i’ve lived in england all my life, and i’ve never seen a single bowler hat except at fancy dress parties
we do, however, have a thriving youth subculture. england’s answer to the american gangsta is the chav, who think they’re solid as rock, when infact the word is a business term derived from “chelmsford average”. it was originally used to describe a typical resident of the english area of chelmsford. these people had relatively low paid jobs, but spent almost everything they earnt on very distasteful items, and were seen dripping with gold, much like a gypsy.
so to conclude, british culture is prety much the same as american culture, but (usually) with less arrogance, att-tude or the belief that we own the world.
thank you america, your pollution haunts us all.
chav 1: look guys. this tv show from america shows black guys in gangs.
chav 2: wow! maybe we should pretend to be black, and hard. hey, if it’s from usa it must be good!
chav 1: but won’t we become annoying wiggers?
chav 2: nevermind. we’ll just develop extreme arrogance and kick the seven shades of sh-t out of anybody for so much as breathing near us.
chav 2: yeah man! let’s kill british culture!
1 more definition
the british culture is a very defined very old culture. the main point to british culture is that they hate everybody and beyond all reasonable doubt they hate the americans more than anyone else bar the french. the british utterly hate the americans and mabey 1% of the population might actually like america.
religion is not very big in britain and mabey about 10% of the population are actually religious or actually belive in some sort of god.
britain is well known for drinking heavily at young ages, having s-x from about the age of 12-16 and kicking the cr-p out of each other pretty much daily. fighting is a greatly loved sport in the country and 75% of the population love to partic-p-te.
things you should not do in britain. if you have an american accent do not talk. this will likely get you into a fight. no not use the peace sign due to it being remarked as higly offensive.
also absolutly never say soccer. this will most likley get your murdered, shot, tortured and many other imaginable things.
football is the greatest loved sport in britain with cricket, rugby, gold and mabey tennis.
most people in britain grow up with an ambition to claim bennifits, become a hair dresser or a car mechanic.
american: hey guys you watching the soccer?
english friend: dude no.
conclusion: the american has now been stabbed 12 times in the eye.
—–
american: hey guys whats your british culture like?
brits: f-ck off before i merc you.