brokencyde


the act of having a p-n-s inserted into your ear.
1. “holy sh-t, my grandma died last night”
“really? i got brokencyded last night”
“oh man, i’m so sorry.”

2. “did you hear about jerry?”
“he’s in hospital, yeah? the old brokencyde again.”
“it pierced his brain. he spent all day yesterday telling me how much of a musical genius chad kroeger is.”
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2
brokencyde is possibly one of the worst bands ever. people don’t know how that noise they make is even considered music.
dude, i hear she likes brokencyde.

brokencyde sucks, i don’t even know how they can be considered music.
3
music so bad, it has become the universal standard for bad music:

the band that always wins the “what is the worst sh-t–ss music ever created by man” argument. everyone thinks that they know horrible music, but upon subjugation to the “freaxx” youtube video, brokencyde unanimously decides the debate.

it is now the gold standard to which all unbelievably sh-tty music is to be compared.
: oh man, you should have heard this terrible f-cking band this emof-g was playing in his car. i mean worst music ever
(creates jerking motion with hand)

: oh yeah? listen to this.
(finds brokencyde on youtube)

: …my god.
(loses faith in humanity)
4
a band so horrible, they make deaf people cry. if it’s a joke, i don’t get it. if it’s legit, i certainly don’t get it.
“do you like brokencyde?”
“what’s to like?”
5
a group of individuals with questionable intelligence, tallent and reason to live that have sucessfully turned the expression ‘chicken scratch’ into an audible noise.

their ‘music’ (insert joke) relates primarily to the sheep-like, mongroll race of mamal decribed as emo’s.

frequent remarks that can be heard following the discovery of such hillarious bahhuuullshhiiitt!.. are as followed:-

1) oh my jesus lord they make soulja boy look like a lyrical god!
2) i want to emigrate (those hailing from the states.. thank f-ck i don’t live there but no offense, i feel your pain)
3) suicide may actually be the answer, though i fear death won’t take this pain away.
4) f-ck-it.. lets give it a go anyway.. kill me, kill me now!
5) if there is a g-d.. fuuuk me he must be a merciful one.
6) ahhh that’s what the living result of b–st–lity is..

.. and i could go on but it’d only give them more publicity, increase my blood pressure, break my threshold for laughter orrr lead to future impotency.

the end.
imagine four things plus one other thing from albuquerque new mexico, usa.. jacking each other off so hard skin has begun to tear.. throw in a few mindless word combos and a few carefully selected samples from techno, pop, crunk lil jon sh-t, emo, screamo, f-gboygirl, scenekid music.. subsequentially record that sh-t.. play it to a record label, get signed.. and whaalaa! you have brokencyde!
6
ie:brokensh-t

music that makes you really question society and how stupid kids are; the art of getting ear-raped; people that just need to get the f-ck out.
josh: dude i just got brokencyded.

kyle: man i’m so sorry. i think your ears are bleeding.

josh: don’t worry i did that, the sounds were unbearable.
7
no words can describe how bad this music actually is. listen to like the first minutes of schizophrenia on youtube. if you still have your ears, you get a small cookie :).
friend 1: dude, i just listened to schizophrenia by brokencyde. it is amazing. -offers headphone

friend 2: rly? -puts in headphone

newscaster: today, a child, age 15, hung himself from a tree limb on school premises. when we asked the last person to talk to him what could’ve caused this, he said: “i just forced him to listen to this brokencyde song…” we understood immediately that friend 1 was the murderer. later today, he was convicted of 2nd degree murder. he was locked away for 30 years…

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