bumper bowling
the act of driving a motor vehicle down the interstate while tired or intoxicated and “b-mping” back and forth between the rumble strips when you p-ss out. just like in b-mper bowling, the ball reaches it’s final goal, but not without some -ssistance from going in the gutter.
“man i was way to tired to be driving last night. i was b-mper bowling all the way home.”
the tendency of a pedestrian preoccupied with another task (e.g. talking on a cell phone, fiddling with a portable music device) to veer left and right across the sidewalk, unknowingly blocking faster-walking pedestrians attempting to overtake them.
so named for the similarity between the perpetrator’s movements and those of a bowling ball in the eponymous ten-pin bowling variant, in which the lane’s gutters are blocked by b-mpers to prevent gutterb-lls.
“i just missed the muni because i couldn’t get around some bluetooth idiot who was h-lla b-mper bowling.”
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