Cascelerate


a method of speeding up a walk in a studied manner to try and disguise the increased speed and appear to be casually sauntering with an unconcerned air. mainly deployed by dudes on public transport when trying to reach the last empty seat ahead of a pregnant chick.
dude (thinking): “sh-t, only one seat left. no way am i standing on this sh-t. if i cascelerate i can make it ahead of that heifer”
(after sitting down) “my bad, she’s sprogged up. still if i don’t look at her, i ain’t seen her…”

lisa: “i got on the bus with five bags from the supermarket. was just about to sit down when this -ss shot past me into the seat. tried to make out he hadn’t seen me”
ashley: he cascelerated past you. a hole.

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