cell-tech

cell tech – derived from the african plant, “cellerious technecious”, part of the celery family. the 19th carbon atom has been modified making cell tech a nandrolone. due to the sheer potency of this androgen it has been branded a cl-ss aa drug, meaning posession can lead to life imprisonment. cell tech also has a very long active life. cell tech can lead to long term testicular atrophy and severe body m-ss increase in short periods of time.

cell tech is not affected by aromatase or 5alpha-reductase, cell tech is about 45times more more effective per milligram as testosterone esters, for best results and safety with cell tech it should be administered intramuscularly. it is orally biovailable but this is not reccomended due to the effects it can have on major organs. this substance is hard to manufacture therefore making it very expansive and not very available. there are many labs that claim to sell it but very few produce the real drug.

bodybuilder’s often times, when asked about their alleged steroid use, claim to have only taken cell-tech. the reason for this, is cell-tech’s reputation for quick production of large volumes of muscle-m-ss. cell tech is prohibited in almost all professional sports around the world and is notorious for its hazardous and potent effects. most doctors advise against the use of cell tech and will report the use of cell tech to authorities if they hear any of their patients use it. several organizations have been founded in order to stop the production and sales, of cell-tech, one such organization is musclemissions(website : http://www.musclemissions.org/).according to musclemissions, cell-tech can be brewed from supplies found at home and parents should watch their kids closely. infact, bodybuilding.com, is rumored to have a section of the ifbb pro forum, dedicated solely to the production of such chemicals.

cell-tech was first discovered in 1935 as a cure for certain diseases. today it is used medically to cure muscle wasting diseases such as aids or muscular dystrophy.

cell-tech history
after the discovery of the rare nomenclature of this member of the celery family in 1934, the science world exploded with this discovery that would cause a shocking cresendeu of muscular development, dr greg valentino who first created the bioavalible strand of the drug, using water frequency modulation, was the first known user of this compound, which he foolishly decided to test upon himself, isolated in the bicep muscle, which became beyond gargantuan.
it was however, years before, in the far south of africa where this plant thrives on the arid landscape, where tribesmen first found, and implimented this plant, although not as potent as the modulated version, the plant cellerious technecious was widley known as a cure for infertility.

warning cell-tech is a very unstable muscle building phenomenon. do not shake bottle, as it can cause black holes and riffs in the time transition. also avoid contact with v-g-n- as it contains horse s-m-n products
gary: hi, i just wanted to ask if you’re natural?
ronnie: no, i take dat dere cell-tech
steroids that make you teh bigg3st d00d on earth
skinny kid: holy cr-p! how did you get so big!!?!?!
muscle kid with 25″ biceps: i used dat dere celltech
slang for steroids.

popularized by bodybuilding.com forums
person a: think i can look like this guy by next year?

person b: phil health? no, hes on dat dere cell tech