CFO


chief financial officer
close cousin to the ceo, except this is the guy who’s in charge of coordinating a company’s insider trading and profit inflation scams and getting the doc-ments shredded afterwards.
andrew fastow, the former cfo of enron, is in jail for helping orchestrate one of the biggest corporate investment scams of the century. his boss, ceo kenneth lay, pretended he didn’t know what fastow was up to in order to save his own -ss. what a bunch of sc-mbags.
corporate f-ck off

a position held by an individual whose sole purpose is to waste company time and resources.
after stealing all the paper clips and creating paper clip mountain, the boss promoted me to the newly opened cfo position!
check facebook officer
boyfriend: i’m now the cfo of the company!
girlfriend: wow! i’m proud of you! you must be controlling much of the finance in the company!
boyfriend: er… no, i only check facebook… that’s why i’m cfo…

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