a drink:
1.25 ounce jack daniels whiskey
1 ounce peach schnapps
mix with ginger beer on ice
jb: this is a great drink you invented blair! what’s it called?
blair: a georgia mule.
jb: awesome.
jb: hey everyone, i invented a new drink. try it!
everyone but blair: awesome drink! what’s it called?
jb: a chattanooga!! yeah, i just came up with it.
everyone but blair: a chattanooga!! it’s awesome. (chanting) chattanooga! chattanooga! chattanooga!
blair: dude. wtf?
jb: what?
the home of double cola, moon pie, krystal (southern white castle version), the lookouts baseball team, the tennessee aquarium, the chattanooga choo choo, and the first coca-cola bottling company. it is located in southeast tennessee, it has two mountains named “lookout” and “signal”, and it has the tennessee river flowing by.
man: excuse me, but, how do you get to chattanooga from here?

teenage boy: uh, my father usually takes me there.
a city where all the white kids like to act like they’re in a gang what when confronted by a real gang member they act like b-tches.
white kid from chattanooga: yo yo b’z up c’z down f-ck crabz blood till i die

black gang member: n-gg- what yo -ss say

white kid from chattanooga: umm…sorry! -runs away-

black gang member: b-tch you betta run
crunk metropolis in mid-east south tennessee, an hour north of atl, an hour south of k-town. nominated for the most crunk city ever by lil john and the eastside boys.
1. thank g-d for chattanooga, otherwise the only good thing south of knoxville would be f-ck-ng south america.

person 1: i hear lil’ john is switching from atl to chatt-town to promote his new alb-m.
person 2: good. atlanta sucks nuts.
worst place to live in the world! filled with syphilis, drugs, and wiggers. yuppers
dude a4: this place sucks….
dude a7: man i hate living in chattanooga
dude a9: i rather live in africa
dude a4: me too
dude a7: florida pwns too
a place were everyone is
a.a wigger
b.a crackhead
c.emo or scean
d.f-cking boring
yo my ninja i went to chattanooga and scored some crack!
a sweet little town in the tennessee valley known for everything from bottling c-ka cola to moon pies.

also known as:
you really should go visit chattanooga!

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