Cheeto Nipples


a condition caused by abnormally long, protruding nipples. commonly, the length of the nipple is longer than the diameter of the entire areola. when this occurs, the victim experiences a higher frequency of dry skin, resulting in an ashy and flaky topography (read: cheetos dust). see also: stevie wonder nipples.
bryan: the following is the equation for cheeto nipples: length of protusion divided by diameter of areola. if the the ratio is greater than one, you are at risk for cheeto nipples.

laryssa: “i have this dust all over my sweater from dandruff.”

leah: “it’s not dandruff, it’s cheeto nipple residue.”

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