christmas pregnant


eating so much you feel fat(ter) and ashamed. gluttony in its most pure form – specifically during the entire month of december, and trailing off sometime the end of january
dude: “are you hiding a whole turkey under that sweater?”
me: “no, dude, i’m just christmas pregnant. i think i ate a whole turkey though…”
dude: “oh.. well just don’t eat so much you give birth all over the place. and leave me some cheetos, b-tch!”
me: “whoever eats the last one.. wins!”

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