Chumpkin

an almost instantly recognisable, but previously undefined/uncl-ssified native of modern britain.

a post millenium cutural phenomenon that occurs when natural and manmade habitats intersect.

a chumpkin©® is in its basest form an unfortunate hybrid of chav and country b-mpkin, rarely seen outside the areas where large towns and rural countryside directly connect.

first identified and officially cl-ssified within the m25 in a housing estate on the outskirts of north west london in 2009 these creature have now been identified across the uk and as far as eastern europe.
chumpkin, ongar, rickmansworth, a few spotted in bermondsey (but they may have been of the travelling community)
a mutated cat with a western hat that has about four nuclear fusion bombs surgically implanted in it. when said cat dies, they go off.
i think chumpkins got out…

oh, sh-t! run!

-explosion-
it is when you get a bl-wj-b when you are eating something.
i love when i get taco bell and a chumpkin from stacy.
when a man jacks off while taking a sh-t
i was so hard up for a blumpkin, i gave myself a chumpkin.
a combination of a munchkin and a chump. one who always says “i will do it later”. they contribute nothing to society. they are often seen lounging on a couch or bean bag with a bag of cheetos. his goal in life is to drop out of school and smoke pot all day, although this is just a “threat” as he is too much of a p-ssy to actually do it. he also has his own language called “chumpkinese” which may sound similar to jibberish. think “don vito”esqe.
beware of the chumpkins
a fat chick
“dude did you see those f-cking chumpkins in the food court?!”

“yeah, what about them?”

“i’d love to harpoon one of those wales” 😉
receiving a bl-w j-b while eating a cheeseburger.
i was sitting on my couch eating a cheeseburger, while my girl was giving me a chumpkin.

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