Ciggalax


(n)(pathology) the terrible onset of stomach contractions caused shortly after taking several drags from a cigarette. this feeling intensifies to such an extent that the user becomes immobile and asocial, focusing solely on the need to evacuate their bowels as soon as possible.
last pizza boat friday, i waited on the lunch line for almost twenty f-ckin’ minutes. as if that weren’t enough, my misfortune was exacerbated by the fact my long-awaited pizza boat capsized onto the floor and the free milk was lumpy. i checked my watch and was relieved that there was still ten minutes of recess left. relief quickly turned to agony, as the marb light i snuck behind the school to smoke gave me such awful ciggalax, i had no choice but to sit out of kickball.

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