clam head


a person who will talk sh-t non-stop, no matter who or what is around. like a clam, it’ll open&close it’s mouth non-stop.
1. ” d-mn yoo, trisha’s a f-ckin’ clam head. ”

2. ” daaang, you know ashely f-cked joe again. she’s sucha f-ckin’ sl-t. yo, she a f-ckin’ std wh-r-.. ”
” kstfu ray. just cus you can’t get non don’t mean you gotta start clam headin. ”
clam head is a dude that is not good at anything but once you get him treading clams he is a savant. he tends to bring up clams every couple of seconds while his partners might take minutes.
you will notice that when clammers first jump in the bay they will be separated from each other by at least 100 feet between them. after a couple of minutes it is easy to pick out the clam head as the other clammers will begin to move towards the clam head until they are touching him. this phenomena is explained by the fact that the clam head can always find the “nest” which can have many clams sitting on top of each other.
the non clam heads move closer to try to get in on that nest. when this happens, the clam head simply moves away and finds another nest.
clam heads are very popular in the water but usually geeks out of the water. their moment of glory (time of glory) is only during the time while treading away. clam heads never hold a bucket for the clams. there is usually a helper holding the bucket for the clam head (note the status in the water). when there is no bucket, clam heads are always struggling to hold the clams they are catching. clam heads always count their clams out loud as they are catching them to make sure everyone knows they are the best. clam heads usually have stinky feet with semi-black toenails and it is not known if this contributes to their prowness catching clams though studies are on-going. it is always a good thing to have a clam head in your party when going clamming as they get so many clams others can take breaks and drink beer. it is very hard to get a clam head out of the water. the only known method is to urinate on him in the water and when he feels the warm water something in the clam head tells him it’s time to get on the boat.
bring richie clamming with us, he’s such a clam head we can all listen to the yankee game and drink beers while he treads for those clams and makes us rich.

ok, i’ll go pick him up but i think he’s at the nerd convention right now.

tell him we’re going clamming. he’ll come.

you’re right. ha ha ha ha.
a type of hairstyle favored by star trek fans who identify with the klingons and their culture.
i’m sure we’ll see at least one clamhead at the con. it’ll be a nice change from all of those cheesy ferengi-oids marching around!

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