cock screamer
n. a morning wood erection so shocking in its ferocity that the phenomenon has been described by eminent scientists as the physical equivalent of a prolonged, audible scream. occurs without warning, and does not require s-xual stimuli. usually occurs during sleep, leading to awakening caused by its severity. duration is commonly protracted. unlike a typical erection, a c-ck screamer is hard enough to bang a nail into a wall.
“ken, i know it’s early but i think that’s the postman knocking on the front door with my parcel. would you get out of bed and get it for me? i can’t find my underwear again, and the last time i answered the door naked to him, he fell backwards and broke his wrist.”
“sorry joan, there’s no way i can get it. i’ve got a real c-ck screamer going on down here and it’s showing no signs of calming down. if i open the door i’ll take the lad’s f-cking eye out.”
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