coiled snake
one long, continuous t-rd purposefully left in the toilet by its former owner as a “trophy sh-t”.
it spirals around the inside of the bowl, showing those who enter the john q. public afterwards just how supremely talented, artistic, and considerate, its manufacturer is.
karen: wow, that was fast!
w-lly: yeah, well, i didn’t use the john, because there was a coiled snake in one stall …
karen: a coiled snake! oh my g-d! did you tell the manager?
w-lly: no, honey, someone left a big, huge, t-rd in the john. it stunk like h-ll, and i wanted to flush it, but it was laying on top of a gigantic tp plug. and the other toilet had john c-mmings on the seat.
karen: whose that?
w-lly: you know (doing a “jerk off” motion) like “d-ck c-mmings” or “peter c-mmings” but on the john.
karen: oh.
w-lly: on the way back, i’m checking out the gas station across the street, maybe they take better care of their john q. public!
karen: i get it! you mean customers, right?
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