Confusincest


the strange phenomenon where all of your close friends become an extended family where “blood lines” overlap and make absolutely no sense to the people involved or those observing from a sane vantage point.
friend 1: i have 3 moms, one of them being male, 4 daughters (1 adopted), my stepmom is also my sister, my other brother is the black sheep literally, another sister is my synchronized s-x twin, and one of my daugters has like, 3 dads.

friend 2: o_o…that’s total confusincest…can i join?

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    (short for contributing to society): 1)what everty warm-blooded college graduate/silicon valley inhabitant (who can pay his rent), man, woman, and child should be doing; 2)the act of helping your fellow man; 3)giving positive input; 4)making life better for everyone; 5)tax evasion; president elect: “ya’ll oughta cown-tree-bute!” me/you: i contribute every year and every waking moment […]


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