crotch rocks
t-st-cl-s, b-lls; often used to describe something negatively.
man, that movie sucked big fat hairy smelly crotch rocks.
rock at its lowest, least intellectual form. also known as hair metal, crotch rock can be recognized by many distinctive traits, such as high-pitched nasal vocals, stupid lyrics, simple or nonexistent song structure, extremely basic drumming, or tasteless guitar w-nkery. named as such because crotch rock guitarists usually wear their guitars slung extremely low, often down to their crotch or past it, to the point where it actually interferes with their ability to play their instrument properly. crotch rock rose to prominence in the 1980’s, and is exemplified by bands such as motley crue and poison. it is notable in that most songs of the genre are completely indistinguishable from one another, and lack any sort of memorability or catchiness whatsoever.
no, that’s a stupid suggestion. how am i supposed to sing that – do i look like i’m castrated? and we’d never play crotch rock, anyway. it’s music for stupid people.
a brand of music that is marked by the mental image of, as you listen and close your eyes, you can see the lead singer clutching his crotch through a pair of shiny leather pants to make his voice sound more like he is oraly farting than singing. other signs: guitarists who frequent the pelvic thrust and power stance, drummers who play enormous drum sets and spin their sticks while playing
“dude, have you heard the new alb-ms from nickelback and creed?”
“uh, no, i would rather pour bleach in my eyes than listen to crotch rock.”
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